How far have we (JATS) come:

hahaha...Prashant gen next has its own perceptions about life-style. Let them have their own way and enjoy their life once they become adult (so he is.), unless it affects their health which is not the case. Perceptions keep changing with time and all of us have had our own way after attaining adulthood.
पंछियों को पिंजरों में कैद रखेंगे तो वे खुले आसमान में उड़ना कैसे सीखेंगे I और उस परिंदे (my son) को उड़ने का बहुत शौक है I (He has already co-piloted a single engine trainer jet in a London Flying Club simply by learning through computer simulation. I have posted some of his photographs while flying on my facebook account). He is already adult and is an adventurous person, so I give him all liberties. The point is if children are doing good without compromising the dignity of the family and their own health, let them carve out their life style in their own way. No matter what they eat and what is their schedule.
hahaha....sahi kahi aapne...mujhe pehle lag raha tha ki wo kaafi chhota hai.....
 
Freedom and working in the kitchen? I don't understand what women really want. Why they are so fed up with their daily chores. Leave apart working women, a typical house wife is doping nothing at home except "khaat todna" and " chatak-matak karna". house maids are hired for almost all daily chores in India, this may be different in foreign countries. Still they need help in kitchen. As far as freedom is concerned , If daughters want freedom to elope with some "erra-gairra nathhu khaira' putting family prestige on stake, It is "not" acceptable.

And yes, we want to eat "choon" three times in a day and we will not go in kitchen.............I am clear now?

lol mate ... quite hilarious .. for a moment I thought i am in humor section. Hilarious it may be, but I personally do not agree with the 'bulk' of the 'essence' of the message .
 
वैसे तो जाट सभी क्षेत्रों में अच्छा कर रहे हैं, लेकिन कुछ पहलू ऐसे हैं, जिन पर गंभीरता से ध्यान देना बहुत जरूरी है. एक तो खेती करने वाले जाटों
की भूमि का जो अधिग्रहण हो रहा है, यह ठीक नहीं है. जिन जाटों की जमीन का अधिग्रहण किया जाता है उसके बदले एक तो उन्हें मुआवजा पर्याप्त नहीं मिलता, दूसरे ऐसे जाट मुआवजे में मिली रकम से पुनः जमीन नहीं खरीदते, बल्कि उल्टे-सीधे धंधों में पड़ जाते हैं और बर्बादी की राह पकड़ लेते हैं.
जाटों के जो बच्चे उच्च शिक्षा ग्रहण कर रहे हैं, मेरे ख्याल से उनमें से बहुत से ऐसी सोच के होते जा रहे हैं कि ये क्या जाति-वाती, क्या गौत्र सिस्टम? इस दुनिया में सब एक समान हैं. जिंदगी बस एक बार मिलती है, इसमें जितना मजा ले सकते हो, ले डालो.
यह सोच बेहद घातक है. अभी कॉमनवेल्थ गेम्स में जाटों ने बहुत अच्छा किया तो दूसरी जातियों में भी अच्छा करने की होड़ लगी. अलग-अलग जाति, धर्म, देश प्रतिस्पर्धा की भावना पैदा करते हैं. यह दुनिया केवल ऐश लेने के लिए नहीं बनाई गई, बल्कि कुछ अच्छा और विशेष करके दिखाने के लिए बनाई गई है. अलग-अलग देश, धर्म नहीं होंगे तो फिर कैसे ओलिम्पिक और कैसे विश्व कप?
जो जाट रोजगार के लिए दूसरे देशों का रुख कर रहे हैं, उनकी तीसरी-चौथी पीढ़ी कैसे ईसाई बनने से बचेगी और कैसे जाट बनी रहेगी, यह भी एक यक्ष प्रश्न है.
खैर, जो भारतीय हिंदू जाट हैं, वे फिलहाल बहुत अच्छे ढंग से आगे बढ़ रहे हैं.
 
वैसे तो जाट सभी क्षेत्रों में अच्छा कर रहे हैं, लेकिन कुछ पहलू ऐसे हैं, जिन पर गंभीरता से ध्यान देना बहुत जरूरी है. एक तो खेती करने वाले जाटों
की भूमि का जो अधिग्रहण हो रहा है, यह ठीक नहीं है. जिन जाटों की जमीन का अधिग्रहण किया जाता है उसके बदले एक तो उन्हें मुआवजा पर्याप्त नहीं मिलता, दूसरे ऐसे जाट मुआवजे में मिली रकम से पुनः जमीन नहीं खरीदते, बल्कि उल्टे-सीधे धंधों में पड़ जाते हैं और बर्बादी की राह पकड़ लेते हैं.
जाटों के जो बच्चे उच्च शिक्षा ग्रहण कर रहे हैं, मेरे ख्याल से उनमें से बहुत से ऐसी सोच के होते जा रहे हैं कि ये क्या जाति-वाती, क्या गौत्र सिस्टम? इस दुनिया में सब एक समान हैं. जिंदगी बस एक बार मिलती है, इसमें जितना मजा ले सकते हो, ले डालो.
यह सोच बेहद घातक है. अभी कॉमनवेल्थ गेम्स में जाटों ने बहुत अच्छा किया तो दूसरी जातियों में भी अच्छा करने की होड़ लगी. अलग-अलग जाति, धर्म, देश प्रतिस्पर्धा की भावना पैदा करते हैं. यह दुनिया केवल ऐश लेने के लिए नहीं बनाई गई, बल्कि कुछ अच्छा और विशेष करके दिखाने के लिए बनाई गई है. अलग-अलग देश, धर्म नहीं होंगे तो फिर कैसे ओलिम्पिक और कैसे विश्व कप?
जो जाट रोजगार के लिए दूसरे देशों का रुख कर रहे हैं, उनकी तीसरी-चौथी पीढ़ी कैसे ईसाई बनने से बचेगी और कैसे जाट बनी रहेगी, यह भी एक यक्ष प्रश्न है.
खैर, जो भारतीय हिंदू जाट हैं, वे फिलहाल बहुत अच्छे ढंग से आगे बढ़ रहे हैं.

Upender ji 100% agree karti hoon mein aapki baat se.
Jat ka doosra naam hain kisan aur agar kisan ke paas uski zameen hi nahin rahegi to apne aap hi barbadi ki rasta khul jata hain. uspar zameen ka paisa to jaise sone pe suhaga hain. Bina mehant kare roti bhi hajam nahin hoti paisa kaise hajam hoga. Meine is tarah ki bahot saare kisse sune aur dekhe hain. Jin kisano ki zameen le li jaati hain yeh unki baad kismati hain is mein koi shak nahin hain.

Delhi ke aas paas ke gaon mein yahi sabh ho raha hain aur uska nateeja yeh hain ki bahot saare kisson mein ki poori young generation kaharb ho rahi hain. Iska solution jahan tak mujhe pata hain intervnetion on time hain. Intervention ya toh govt se ya gaon ke samjhdar logon se. Doosra education.

Jahan tak doosre desh mein Jats ki baat hain jis insaan ko apne culture se pyar aur proud hoga woh usko zaroor jinda rakhega. Jats ko proud hain apne Jat pan pe to mujhe sure hain ki bahar rehne wale JAT sudhre hue honge.
 
1. Jats as a community is progressing along with the flow of change that is being winessed in India, as a community now we are seen as hardworking, physically strong, competitive and intelligent race ,although a bit rough and aggressive..now people in south India also know and recognize jats as a separate race because of the accomplishments in different fields, such as the recent commonwealth games & asian games, etc.
I would like to change / see more education in our community as still lotsa jats are involved in agri sector with little exposure to better education, but let me also add here that this is changing very fast and maybe in another 5 yrs jats will rock,.
2. As regards the men and their attitude towards freedom to wives and daughters and the helping in kitchen is concerned, it also depends on the education and exposure ..You will see very modern as well as very conservative outlook on such issues in our community...but yes, things are changing fast..HERE I would like to emphasize that this change is more because of the progress made by our girls/women in different fields.
3. Yep Shibani...jat menfolk really dig their rotis.. tasalli roti kha ke hi milti hai..I think our build and lifestyle too needs rotis.
 
1. Jats as a community is progressing along with the flow of change that is being winessed in India, as a community now we are seen as hardworking, physically strong, competitive and intelligent race ,although a bit rough and aggressive..now people in south India also know and recognize jats as a separate race because of the accomplishments in different fields, such as the recent commonwealth games & asian games, etc.
I would like to change / see more education in our community as still lotsa jats are involved in agri sector with little exposure to better education, but let me also add here that this is changing very fast and maybe in another 5 yrs jats will rock,.
2. As regards the men and their attitude towards freedom to wives and daughters and the helping in kitchen is concerned, it also depends on the education and exposure ..You will see very modern as well as very conservative outlook on such issues in our community...but yes, things are changing fast..HERE I would like to emphasize that this change is more because of the progress made by our girls/women in different fields.
3. Yep Shibani...jat menfolk really dig their rotis.. tasalli roti kha ke hi milti hai..I think our build and lifestyle too needs rotis.

Hi Jagdeep,
Apologies first for not responding to your response. I appreciate your response and your views. I have full faith that JATS are moving ahead progressively and are establishing themselves in every field. I agree that we need more education in our community but I would still want JATS to be connected to our main profession KHETI. I would like to see educated farmers.
Roti got it sir...thats not going to change boo hoo.
Thanks again Jagdeep
 
Mere hisab se maa baap apne beti dete hain yahi aapne aap mein bahot badi baat hain uske aage koi expectation nahin honi chahiye.........

v well said Shibani ji...lekin ye baat bahut kam logo ki samaz me aati hai, log ye bhi nahi sochte ki kya wo apna beta aise jindgi bhar ke liye de sakte hain jaise ek ladki apna ghar aur apne parents ko chhod kar ek naye ghar me jaati hai aur dil se sabko apnaati hai, wo apne parents aur family to secondary rakhti hai aur husband aur inlaws ko top priority deti hai....shayad koi ladka aisa nahi kar sakta...
 

What I would like to see changing:
Well my answer in regards to what I would like to change in our culture is...........the amount of pressure on parents of married girls. Pehle shadi ka kharcha karo, phir har festival par, phir jabh baccha hota hain tabh and the story goes on.
I feel for the parents. Jitni bar damad ghar aaye usko maan do........I think maan dil se diya jaata hain magar humare yahan iska matlab kuch alag hi hain..............I know of very many families that are breaking this tradition and only accept Rs.1 in maan. Truly appreciate them.

Mere hisab se maa baap apne beti dete hain yahi aapne aap mein bahot badi baat hain uske aage koi expectation nahin honi chahiye............magar sirf galti maa baap ki nahin hain I know of very many girls who expect their parents to give them all the time.....GIRLS UR PARENTS BROUGHT U IN THIS WORLD, EDUCATED U ITS ABOUT TIME WE STOP ASKING FOR MORE.......I think ladkiyoon ka bahot bada haath hain in traditions ke aaj bhi hone ka...
Ravider ji thanks for adding humor to my post..............I was expecting this flavour as well in responses.


But what about property rights? On paper (law), the girl child has an equal right to the property of her parents. But how many girls actually get a share from ancestral property? Maan baap to sabhi bachhon ka palan poshan, padhaai likhaai karwaate hain. Fir ladke ko saari property aur ladki ko kuchh nahin? That is surely not progressive, which I think is the spirit behind your thread.

And don't misunderstand- I am not in favor of dowry or any other lena dena, that has become more of a show-off thing rather than actual maan-taan. It is much worse when such things are "expected" or "demanded". But I think there was a good angle in gifts given by parents and even brothers on special occasions to the girl in a patriarchal society, where you don't give her any property. These gifts are a sort of "compensation" to the girl for giving up her claim (now when the law gives the girl the legal right). Even earlier when there was no law, it just made things a bit more fair for girls, didn't it? Of course, the ideal way would be no gifts of any sort and equal division of property.
 
I cook over the weekend and usually my wife loves whatever I make. It could be partly because she wants me to keep making food in the future though! :)
 
Anyone who wants to see how far Jats have come, please see a Jat "pakaying Khana", doing "Chulha Chouki". :) :D
I cook over the weekend and usually my wife loves whatever I make. It could be partly because she wants me to keep making food in the future though! :)
 
Anyone who wants to see how far Jats have come, please see a Jat "pakaying Khana", doing "Chulha Chouki". :) :D

Jakhar ji, I believe cooking is an art and gives a lot of satisfaction if the food turns out to be good. And sometimes women also deserve a break from their regular chores. I cook the food on my own(with plenty of Ghee) and enjoy it throughly, really it gives me the satisfaction which I can't get with outside food.
 
But what about property rights? On paper (law), the girl child has an equal right to the property of her parents. But how many girls actually get a share from ancestral property? Maan baap to sabhi bachhon ka palan poshan, padhaai likhaai karwaate hain. Fir ladke ko saari property aur ladki ko kuchh nahin? That is surely not progressive, which I think is the spirit behind your thread.

Kapil I think the law has been changed and the girls have equal right in the property....farak sirf itna hain ki liadkiyaan yeh haak generally nahin leti hain jiki wajah hum sabh jante hi hain. The spirit behind my thread was more so about JAT traditions and how some of the traditions have come off age and need alterations. I wanted to find out from members which traditions should be altered and why and how of the same.

And don't misunderstand- I am not in favor of dowry or any other lena dena, that has become more of a show-off thing rather than actual maan-taan. It is much worse when such things are "expected" or "demanded". But I think there was a good angle in gifts given by parents and even brothers on special occasions to the girl in a patriarchal society, where you don't give her any property. These gifts are a sort of "compensation" to the girl for giving up her claim (now when the law gives the girl the legal right). Even earlier when there was no law, it just made things a bit more fair for girls, didn't it? Of course, the ideal way would be no gifts of any sort and equal division of property.

I agree giving gift out of one's own genereosity is heart felt gesture but just ik riwaaz nibhane ke liye duniya ko dikahne ke liye I disapprove of that. The biggest gift that any parent can give to there child is education and good morals. Kapil don't you think Humari community mein lena dena zyada hain? or I should say we come next to Marwaris....they are way up.
 
Jakhar ji, I believe cooking is an art and gives a lot of satisfaction if the food turns out to be good. And sometimes women also deserve a break from their regular chores. I cook the food on my own(with plenty of Ghee) and enjoy it throughly, really it gives me the satisfaction which I can't get with outside food.

Plenty of Ghee Deepandra ji seems like you need to visit health and fitness section...kidding. When cooking is not a everyday chore it is staisfying to do so.
 
I cook over the weekend and usually my wife loves whatever I make. It could be partly because she wants me to keep making food in the future though! :)

Seems like you don't only cook well but you also leave the kitcehn spic and span....coz when men eneter the kitchen gosh they leave mess that takes hours to clean.
 
I agree giving gift out of one's own genereosity is heart felt gesture but just ik riwaaz nibhane ke liye duniya ko dikahne ke liye I disapprove of that. The biggest gift that any parent can give to there child is education and good morals. Kapil don't you think Humari community mein lena dena zyada hain? or I should say we come next to Marwaris....they are way up.

Shibani, yes the law gives property rights to the girls, but as you said, no one follows it. And that's because we are brought up in a culture where the tradition is that property goes from father to son. If you think the tradition of lena dena has come off age, then this tradition of not giving property rights to the girl has also come off age. There are communities in Kerala where no lena dena happens as all the children, boys or girls, get equal share of the property. This is not the case in most North Indian communities and Jats are no exception. If the sheer amount of money that exchanges hands on the wedding day is a parameter, then Jats would be much lower in the list. There are communities, where it is a norm to have a rate list based on groom's qualifications. Indian society is in middle of a materialistic revolution where showing off is part of the game. And Jats are no exception.

Personally, I think one can never give too much to a girl, if you compare it against what is legally hers and not being given to her. Your line about biggest gift being education and good morals is a sort of truism, a feel-good abstract thought. In practise, the worst of guy, even one who beats up his parents, gets the property while the girl doesn't. And if anything, even in education or nutrition, most parents tend to focus on the male child more than the female child.

If the question is about how far Jats have progressed vis-a-vis treatment of women, then things like what chores males help in are important but nothing compared to the elephant in the room, property rights, that no one wants to talk about.
 
Shibani, yes the law gives property rights to the girls, but as you said, no one follows it. And that's because we are brought up in a culture where the tradition is that property goes from father to son. If you think the tradition of lena dena has come off age, then this tradition of not giving property rights to the girl has also come off age. There are communities in Kerala where no lena dena happens as all the children, boys or girls, get equal share of the property. This is not the case in most North Indian communities and Jats are no exception. If the sheer amount of money that exchanges hands on the wedding day is a parameter, then Jats would be much lower in the list. There are communities, where it is a norm to have a rate list based on groom's qualifications. Indian society is in middle of a materialistic revolution where showing off is part of the game. And Jats are no exception.

Personally, I think one can never give too much to a girl, if you compare it against what is legally hers and not being given to her. Your line about biggest gift being education and good morals is a sort of truism, a feel-good abstract thought. In practise, the worst of guy, even one who beats up his parents, gets the property while the girl doesn't. And if anything, even in education or nutrition, most parents tend to focus on the male child more than the female child.

If the question is about how far Jats have progressed vis-a-vis treatment of women, then things like what chores males help in are important but nothing compared to the elephant in the room, property rights, that no one wants to talk about.

I agree with pretty much every thing that you said here Kapil but my concern is more when parents are forced into giving because of the tradition. Every parent wants to give the most and more to their kids and they do so as well. By educating a girl and giving her the best of everything you are definately preparing her to meet the challenges of life. Once a girl is married off the follow on traditions of giving shouldn't be forced on parents because of the society andf its expectation. I hate to see parents pressured into meeting these challenges time and again and there are points when the view of girls being a burden creeps in. Imagine somone with three married daughters and have to cope up with such demands.

Kids have equal right on parents property nowdays but I think girls choose not to take it because then there future ties with brothers get hampered. Its good to see girls have a choice now whether they want the property or not.
 
v well said Shibani ji...lekin ye baat bahut kam logo ki samaz me aati hai, log ye bhi nahi sochte ki kya wo apna beta aise jindgi bhar ke liye de sakte hain jaise ek ladki apna ghar aur apne parents ko chhod kar ek naye ghar me jaati hai aur dil se sabko apnaati hai, wo apne parents aur family to secondary rakhti hai aur husband aur inlaws ko top priority deti hai....shayad koi ladka aisa nahi kar sakta...

Forget the ideal girl in todays cicumstances !!
It was only in the times of our previous generation that a girl used to stick by his husband and his family in whatever may come.
Girls todays are hell lot different and demanding ! From the first day of marriage they start ploying about how to get the guy away from his family.
They are not interested in the family but just the guy!! Mother and sister in law as long as visible are a continuous pain for them !!

Further to add to the guy's woes are the outdated laws on marriage which support the girls blindfolded !!
 
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