Name me Not..

[akanksha]

Name Me Not.. ​

“ A lot will always mean afew
till your self allows you not to start anew”​

Silence can either give or take away.
Yes, even walking with a feline grace, could pamper my ego not ans step over my extremities not. It was always all or nothing for me, and no middle context out. And just like a choice at times is spontaneous and also precise needing not a second thought , likewise nothing could make me re-think about my acts , my extremities or jaywalking or jauntiness ever . My self remained conservative of the else that surrounds and I lived thus in a world where isolation would allow to actualize the dreams in every new morn would leave with a lived vision seen by the open eyes of the sleeping self. The mystical night charmed enough to make me feel connected to my self and explore anew all that lies beyond a lighted arena of nightly moments. ​

We light and can see. But how to light the unseen? The unexplored? ​

A lot lies unlocked in the depth of the night which can never be highlighted or wholly lighted. Life was not all of felicity and adorning amulets for me. Life was not even shared with someone I loved.

Waking your self up every day to start afresh is not even half as easy as just waking up to the light of the sun. Like the sun or the moon or the X or Y, I didn’t want to be. Just let me by self and I would be alright. To let situations not so favorable make me weak, was my nature not.


I had given a lot and when I was giving and sharing and caring, I had expectations not. It was only when silence came in, that it made me expect. When my innermost thoughts needed to be consoled and reassured that ‘its all gonna be fine’ , I could find only my two self. One would cry for being a loner and the other would whisper, ‘ Being left alone would become your strength , would make you self-consoling, self-loving and self-everything .’

If everything needs to done alone
Then what have I been doing in this world?​

The second self did make me strong but to an extent where I would feel the need not of being with anyone else. While trying to hide from my second self, when sometimes I would let my real self cry, I knew that no one would understand and that it is not natural to expect. Again, to hurt myself at times, I would not even let cry.


When I loved I was sure not, but I let that doubt fade away the vibrant smile not. And gradually when I was sure, I was left alone.

I felt free and not at the bottom of the lonely abyss waiting for that person to come to me. My spiritual self taught me to be happy in just any kind of situation . And that happiness made me not selfish, or acerbic towards life and people who love. I was all of my self , in love, in life , in dreams , in hope, in nirvana with my desires, in everything that touches the depth of life.

Realization of everything that’s true, does come, sooner or later.​

Since happiness had taken away my expectations, I was curious not. My love made me strong because for a while I was with that person not. And I could cherish. I am the same person not, who loved to be able to live. I changed in heathen, and now living to love. So you Oh past, can name me not.. …

Walking on the road and on the roof of one’s house has a world of a difference. On the road, on your own, nobody knows you. It gives space. So, I was walking alone on the road thinking and trying to conclude. When I could conclude, I could also move on.
But concluding love?

I saw people walking in anonymity and just when I was about to conclude and step over it in my thoughts, someone smiled. And I smiled back.

“ When life spaces up or takes away, it moves on
until it gives back.. ..”​

I could conclude my love not because I could conclude my self not.
So all that has been left unspoken, now name it not.
I want to love because of everyone
Else not
I want to share just because I am
Alone not
I love because I want to re-discover, Oh soul, my self through others not
So name me not..
Just like the will, the beliefs can precisely categorize me not
Oh soul, name me not.
Anew, Afresh, Ablaze
My life with every day gather its brand new pace
To name is to know, to know is to define
What is already spoken
Needs not to be captured in
Words again
I am moving out of the other
Self to start anew
My beliefs define my religion
Not
Just like my love defines my
Life not
I am framing a world of my
Thoughts
with a regained strength
I could define you oh soul in
One way not
My life’s gonna be anew,
So you oh time,
Can cover me not,
My life’s gonna be
Anew
Anew
Anew
So you oh my love
Can escape me not
Name me not
Name me not
Name me not.. .. ​

Akanksha Chaudhary ..

 

[vijay]

Welcome back

Akanksha,

First of all welcome back after such a long time and needless to say .... again with a thoughtful composition

Name Me Not.. ​

“ A lot will always mean afew
till your self allows you not to start anew”​

Silence can either give or take away.​

Yes, and sometimes afew means a lot when you are ready to allow anew.

Silence is the best remedy whenever there is any dilemma and/or if things are not working out accordingly. Let it work by itself instead of forcing. Believe me, best results are those which occurs naturally, whether given or taken away.

Fate and/or Fortune are terms derived by us, according to our aspirations and benefits... otherwise Nature always decide best for us.​

We light and can see. But how to light the unseen? The unexplored? ​

A lot lies unlocked in the depth of the night which can never be highlighted or wholly lighted. Life was not all of felicity and adorning amulets for me. Life was not even shared with someone I loved.

Night is always dark and it must be for some reasons of its own. Darkness have its own importance otherwise what is the significance of light ?

One need not to share life to love someone and/or need not to love someone to share life.

I had given a lot and when I was giving and sharing and caring, I had expectations not. It was only when silence came in, that it made me expect. When my innermost thoughts needed to be consoled and reassured that ‘its all gonna be fine’ , I could find only my two self. One would cry for being a loner and the other would whisper, ‘ Being left alone would become your strength , would make you self-consoling, self-loving and self-everything .’

If everything needs to done alone
Then what have I been doing in this world?​

The second self did make me strong but to an extent where I would feel the need not of being with anyone else. While trying to hide from my second self, when sometimes I would let my real self cry, I knew that no one would understand and that it is not natural to expect. Again, to hurt myself at times, I would not even let cry.

Expectations always restrict us from giving ( ofcourse sharing and caring too ) and makes us selfish. When people do something without any expectations, it's just done and moved on, no second thoughts. If they get something in return, just a pleasent surprize. On the other hand, when people do something with some expectations and don't get anything in return, it's disappointment and feeling of being hurt.

Silence is always an analyzation of oneself. Best way to understand people on this planet is to understand oneself first. More you know about urself stronger you would be in controlling your emotions and hence happier.

Being lonely works wonderfully most of the times, as it re-arranges the distribution of thoughts again and concentarte on oneself centrally ... ( like what you said... self-consoling, self-loving and self-everything ).

I felt free and not at the bottom of the lonely abyss waiting for that person to come to me. My spiritual self taught me to be happy in just any kind of situation . And that happiness made me not selfish, or acerbic towards life and people who love. I was all of my self , in love, in life , in dreams , in hope, in nirvana with my desires, in everything that touches the depth of life.

Realization of everything that’s true, does come, sooner or later.​

Since happiness had taken away my expectations, I was curious not. My love made me strong because for a while I was with that person not. And I could cherish. I am the same person not, who loved to be able to live. I changed in heathen, and now living to love. So you Oh past, can name me not.. …

Knowing and analyzing onself make us spiritual and hence happy ( ofcourse... in any kind of situation ). Heart doesn't panic when unexpected happens. We don't have disappointments and/or regrets of the happenings of the past or present.

Life becomes just a normal life as it should be i.e. always happy and contented.

Walking on the road and on the roof of one’s house has a world of a difference. On the road, on your own, nobody knows you. It gives space. So, I was walking alone on the road thinking and trying to conclude. When I could conclude, I could also move on.

Exactly...... conclude and move on. That's life.

I could conclude my love not because I could conclude my self not.
So all that has been left unspoken, now name it not.
I want to love because of everyone
Else not
I want to share just because I am
Alone not​

Akanksha Chaudhary ..

Poem is nice and thoughtful....... and conclusions are outstanding

 

[ritu]

hey akanksha! good to see u back.keep writing