"Save NRI marriages"

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ritu said:
..... ur right in india family is there to support.but sometimes family interference makes the matter worse only.i have seen girls willing to compromise but there parents do not let them do so.
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Exactly. This is what I said in another thread on the same thing. Marriages are spoiled in most cases by parents and other relatives. I know how my grandmother constantly created for my mother and tried to brain washes everyone. If I have quote a figure, I will say that at least 90% marriages are spoiled by mother in laws of the girls. Father in law is usually supportive but surrenders to the whims of his wife (mother in law of girl). Intelligent smart boys usually strike a balance and learn how to manage things. No wonder many girls hate combined families.

RK^2
 
Ritu madam Ji..... as i have already mentioned that my comments were for those 1872 NRIs
whose marriage disputes cases have been registered in the court in last year & these facts were not given by me that was Dolly collection !!!!! So it might be one of the possible cause that these NRIs(1872:eek::eek:)
are influenced with western culture & do n't consider marraige a life time- relationship........ i never quoted for each & everone NRI.
Apart from this, I am not doing any thesis on NRI & not being supposed to do in the fothcoming time. As Dolly has invited for an open discussion & she was curious
to know the views of Jatlanders So i pendown two words ....... that's it. why do u make it a prestige issue? Don't be frustrate & not say some one to shutdown his mouth...... Afterall everone here is having equal right whether any NRI like u ......... or ek GHAAS KHODDA........ GHUNTATEK .........hehhehhe.........Like me..................................

ritu said:
yes prashant i am not here to give comments on your postsonly.but if yo will blame people living abroad by calling them westernized .i would not sit quiet.and i do not have to take certificate from u for my maturity level.
and coming to the topic i know this problem very well.its mostly in punjabi families and girls from the villages of punjab r victim of it.now indian government is taking steps to protect those girls.there is a organization here in USA also who helps those girls.
the only step which indian government can also take is to make people in punjab more aware of this problem and discourage marriages like this.
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Jatin saahab ,,One question from u "Do u only believe whatever u have seen??" kya aapne apni Jindgi main kabhi suni sunayi baat pe yakeen nahi kiya.............................................:D:D:D
drjatin said:
bhai ee baat kisne batayi tere tahi! KITNE DESHAN MEIN GHOOM KE YO NISHKARSH NIKALA!
EK NU E SUNI SUNAI BAAT MARRE SAI!
NRI S FOLLOW THEIR TRADITIONS MORE THAN INDIANS AND IT DEPENDS ON THE PERSON NOT THE COUNTRY
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prashantacmet said:
Jatin saahab ,,One question from u "Do u only believe whatever u have seen??" kya aapne apni Jindgi main kabhi suni sunayi baat pe yakeen nahi kiya.............................................:D:D:D
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BHAI MEIN BINA CHEEZ TO JANE COMMENT NAHIN KARTA
kissi JAGAH KE LOOGON KE BAARE MEN KOI JABBE KAWAH GA NA JAB USNE BERA HO! WO UT GAYA HO!
EB MAIN BAROUT KE BAARE MEIN KUCH NAHIN KEH SAKTA KYONKI MAIN WAHAN KABHI GAYA HE NAHI! US JAGAH KE BAARE MEIN TO WAHI AADMI APNI OPINION DEGA NA JO WAHAN GAYA HO !

Bhai kisse baat ke baare mein jabhi apni opinion deni chahiye jab uska poora gyan ho! Chanankya ne kaha hai ki alpgyan sabse ghatak hota hai!
 
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dolly2003 said:
The majority of complaints came from countries like US,UK and canada.
Since last year,1,820 cases hv been registered.
Noting that majority of the complaints came from countries like US,UK and canada,there has been a difficulities in helping womens overseas due to international legal barriers.

SO REGARDINGTHIS I WANNA ASK EVERYONE OUT HERE THAT HOW FAR THESE DISPUTES ARE TRUE N WAT CAN BE THE SOLUTION TO IT...........ITS AN OPEN DISCUSSION SO I WANT EVERY ONE TO GIVE THERE VIEWS ON THIS HIGHLIGHTING ISSUE.
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The problem in solving any issue is "truth" itself. I believe that is the issue, as to how to get to the truth. I feel, each case is different for reasons and outcome. I being in the business where people do share with me some very personal information which some times is sensitive as well as painful, feel that we can't generalize the issue.
I have seen a girl having some mental disorder getting married to a very healthy young man here. They are not divorced yet, but the girl is already in hospital. In another case a very hard working girl getting married to a mentally retarded person here. One case is from Punjab and another from Gujarat. While we might say that it is these two communities who are involved in this kind of trade, but the truth is that we have more cases from these communities only because there are more people abroad from these two states. If we take the % factor, I feel that all states and communities will be relatively in the same category.
The question is why this problem? Is it unique to the marriages with NRI's? I don't think the problem is unique to the marriages with NRI's. I had seen back home various marriages taking place where one of the spouse was either mentally retarded or had some problem that was not brought out to the notice of other party before the wedding.
The problem of the Marriages involving NRI's may be coming to the media's attention more than the similar cases at the regional basis, for it makes a more sensational news and draws more public attention. People may be getting tired to go to Magistrate, or Registrar of marriages, it is much more fashionable to get it to the Embassy.
Here in US I have seen some cases from different communities where the boy or the girl was drug addict, and the parents knew about it and did not tell the other party about it. Such marriage does have very bright chances of landing up in divorce.
I personally feel in a modern world like ours, let the boy and girl make their choices. As parents, let us be open to children and treat them like friends. Advise them about good and bad points of a relationships and the manner in which one can find out more about other person. I feel every one should have the right to choose his/her partner with whom he or she has to spend rest of his/her life. We as parents should advise them and help them in making decisions.
Marriage itself is a separate subject. In many cases it may be the money factor that could be the reason. Who knows, the bride's parents may themselves be involved in extracting money from the groom's parents, since it is the woman's voice that will draw more favorable attention with the law.
 
dolly2003 said:
well i think even u can give your views on this issue...y u wanna put it up on NRI community only......
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Dolly,

I’m sorry to hurt you… I didn’t mean to transfer all the responsibilities to the NRIs. Regarding the matter, I thought that they must have a better idea about the prevailing lifestyle among the NRIs in the western part of the world.

Anyways, it’s just a perception… I believe the western world is too much materialistic, which they call it being practical, and the NRIs living in the western part have got some induction effect… I mean, they somewhat adapt the western lifestyle, knowingly or unknowingly, becoming somewhat materialistic… and I believe that marriage is not just a relationship, it an institution in itself… both the partners should be likeminded to work out together in the various phases of life…

One more problem which persist with the Indian Society is that our culture not so open in respect of girls and the girl who is going abroad after marriage are not used to that culture and doesn’t get of time to adjust in that kind of lifestyle… moreover, marrying the daughter to an NRI is the status symbol for most of the families living in India and this is like a dream come true but fact remains that they have not exposed their progeny to that kind of environment which leads complication while adjusting outside.

Furthermore, the independence among the children brought up under Indian Culture is little less in… which in turn affect the decision making of the person… Also, the decisions made by the parents in their account of life are not always right… the imposed decisions left the person in a situation of conflict and these conflicts if not resolved with a placid mind lead to disasters… And the child who has moved to a foreign land doesn’t have their family with them to support in positive way to come out of the situation…

I suppose, the abovementioned points are the reasons for the breakage / failures of marriages among the girls, who got married to NRIs…

Regards,

Anupam
 
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what do u think only NRI people have prob in there marriages,,,,,,,,,if u have a look at the statistics the marriages in india r more in trouble rather than outside india...............
and that too..... Talli ek haath see nahin Bajati
if two people r commited,,,then nothing goes wrong .......
and i think humm log jo bahar rehate hai ---we r still tryiing to presevre what we have inherited from our culture,,,,but people who r in india (nt offending anybody)but i think they r too fast ,,,,,,,,,i think the indian who move out of there country r better indians than those who r there in india



i totally agree with monika bebe
 
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Bhaiyon simple si baat hai.. Znidgi ki raftaar bahut tej hotee jaa rahee hai.. fast vehicles need better controls and faster reflexes of the people who drive them.. same applies to the institution of marriage... If not steered and controlled properly, any relationship will crash land... It needs constant monitoring with more and more number of indicator lights on the panel... How about conducting a Jatland crash course on marriage managemnt in modren times???????????? Any takers???????????????/ I am serious...

RK^2
 
chhillar said:
Haven't heard your take on this yet Dolly!
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Well!!!!! i am not here to blame the NRI Community but its a general discussion and we all know the incidences of fraudulent NRI MARRIAGES is on the rise.

Lemme tell u its not only punjabis or Gujaratis but i have seen some of the JAT FAMILIES suffering. Maybe, the number is less than Punjabi's and Gujarati's.

There are so many cases being reported but crime goes largely unpunished. Lying, cheating, false promises, unreasonable dowry demands are just some of the things unfortunate NRI brides have to put up with, not to mention divorce n desertion.

When things don't work in cross country marriages, women are especially vunerable, stranded, in a foreign country often without any financial support, they have no one to turn on.

With globalisation, the number of NRI indian marriages is on the rise so there is a need for some institutional mechanism of getting authentic information before these long distance marriages are finanilised bcos dubious marriage bureaus make things worse.

What i think is the indian missions abroad could help out with a task in conjunction with local NGO and even come to rescue of victims and more than that the indian law enforcing agencies need to be more sympathetic in dealing with them.
 
Nri

well 2 me .apart 4 wht doly has stated...........i think the parents who want their daughter to get married 2 a NRI just 4 the sake of money or green card(even the gals 4 tht matter)....must first check up and get done all enqiries....like all parent do here in our society......dekh parakh ke rishta karna chahiye...............so the parents also have to be more concern abt the groom and not his NRI status.............
 
Well this is my first message on this topic....And the message is
keep posting your views, any comments on "Pheer Hera Pheri" and "Da Vinci Code"...I believe Hera-Pheri-I was better.


any comments?????
 
:D Nakul...what about MI-3???? Tom looks superb in that:D
nakul said:
Well this is my first message on this topic....And the message is
keep posting your views, any comments on "Pheer Hera Pheri" and "Da Vinci Code"...I believe Hera-Pheri-I was better.


any comments?????
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ooooooo Nakul........ errr Gauri..............Thaamne to topic ki direction hi divert kar di............hehhehehhe.....hahahah...............nu kaam na challe....... Dolly lath leke sudharegi thaamne........uske thraed ki maatti peet di thaamne..........comment on hair style of Tom Cruise.................................hehehhehe............. ROOKKA@ HAIR STYLE of TOM CRUISE.............................
 
kindly put ur thread under appropriate topics

nakul said:
Well this is my first message on this topic....And the message is
keep posting your views, any comments on "Pheer Hera Pheri" and "Da Vinci Code"...I believe Hera-Pheri-I was better.


any comments?????
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nakul...i believe you have not read the thread before posting the message. The topic was regarding NRI MARRIAGES and you are looking for views on "Pheer Hera Pheri" and "Da Vinci Code"..... Don't know how to react but .....Small suggestion....read the topic before you post the messages.......
 
suub challee

:D arrrey naaraz na hooo......ye thooda khel masti to chalti rahti hain.......ab ye batao france jeetega ya portugal :D
 
ummm, well...

PORTUGAL
portugal guys rock!
like strght desecended frm heaven;) ,,well chiselled faces n bodies!
 
Only NRIs?

I am not sure why this thread is targeting only NRI's? This problem is everywhere, even in India. So the solution should not be to save only NRI marriages but to save marriages in general.

I have seen lots of NRI boys getting married to someone in India but (mostly) NRI girls wants to marry someone locally.

I think, no experience though and don't want to have one, the problem comes when NRI boy ( married to girl from India) plans to back to India (if at all) and better half becomes bitter half. I have seen this in many cases.

There are some other reasons too but being westernized, high speed, doesn't look true.:confused:
 
hhehehhe..........Ghani hassi ki baat kah di Bhai sanjebbe..issne humour section main ger de.........:)...............................
ssiwach said:
I am not sure why this thread is targeting only NRI's? This problem is everywhere, even in India. So the solution should not be to save only NRI marriages but to save marriages in general.

I have seen lots of NRI boys getting married to someone in India but (mostly) NRI girls wants to marry someone locally.

I think, no experience though and don't want to have one, the problem comes when NRI boy ( married to girl from India) plans to back to India (if at all) and better half becomes bitter half. I have seen this in many cases.

There are some other reasons too but being westernized, high speed, doesn't look true.:confused:
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This issue was vry hot few years back n still its happening...as lots of married women committed suicide from mostly Punjab when their husband never came back to take them, to thr country n later found out that these were already got married for 3-4 times just for greed only..and this happened on large amount...to handle this kind of issues govt (deir sey) have got some marriage bureau kind of things now a days which helps to get profile and information of the person from UK n US embassies ....like person is married or not n like these kind of basic things.
http://www.nriinternet.com/Marriages/0_India/2004/2_NRIprince.htm
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2005/20050508/ldh1.htm
 
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