what about intercaste marriage?

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dev said:
Well Said

If at all it matters
It does matter every community members views matter .. however diverse they might be ...

i wanna say that i am into an intercaste marriage and have been living with my parents for the past ten years. My kids are very comfortable when my parents speak to them in pure haryanvi and i have never heard my sife saying"BETA PLEASE TALK IN ENGLISH ", or "Haryanvi mein baat mat karo".
These are the sentences i have often heard in many many houses where the arranged marriages between the so called educated jats and jatnis have been solemnised.

You will obviously have a problem with any opposition to inter-cast marriage as you are into one yourself - its natural.

Now in your case if thing are how you have put them out to be, then your marriage in contemporary context is perfectly fine. There are not enough girls in our community and we need to look outside.

So a Jat male marrying outside is okay, but such marriages come with great responsibilities ... the responsibility to ensure that the future generations do not have a split identity and they identify themselves as Jats only.

A Jat male who is in an intercast marriage, his kids will obviously have a Jat surname (unless ofcouse he is Jewish now) ... so if extra effort is made to ensure that the kids know Jat cultute & traditions .. and feel and identify themselves as Jats then all is good.

It is not hard ... just need a little concious effort is needed as the kids will grow up in a Jat house hold (the father and grandparents being Jat - it will be a Jat majority household and Jat ways will hold propority)

In case of a Jat female marrying outside it will be just opposite (dont blame me .. thats the social set-up)

(I would like to clarify I am no authority to give certificates on peoples Jathood ... The comments herein are only my views, I am in no way intending or trying to profess a code of conduct for Jats. Please fell free to disagree, dispute or rubbish my views)

I would reqest all the jatlanders not to take it otherwise but most of the so called messiahs of the Jat society are the ones whose kids or grandkids are ones who leave apart speaking are not able to understand our language.

You are so right .. the urban Jats think speaking in Haryanvi has a "backward" tag attached to it ... this is unfortunate and embarassing .. Its about time we started taking pride in our boli, culture, blood and traditions.
.................

so guys please ,it can be a personal matter if somebody marries out of caste and we should not be judgemantal about their loyalty towards their parents or the community.

with advnce apoligies if i have offended somebody.
dev.
Click to expand...

I am not being judgemental .... but the truth is the truth .. the future generation of intercast couples cannot outrighly claim to be Jat .. especially if its a Jat girl that marries outside the community ... And its not because i say so .. its just the social set-up we live in ... thats the way things work ..

As for guys .. it is easier to get the family accepted in the Jat fold, if one takes the right steps and the kids have one and only identity .. i.e Jat
 
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Ek purana kissa yaad aa gaya, ek baar pati or patni main jhagra shuru ho gaya ki who apne bete ko bada hone ke bad kya banayenge. Pati chah raha tha ki bacha Doctor bane jabki patni chah rahi thi ki who bada hokar Advocate, bane. Jhagra itns badh gaya ki dono ko court main pahuchna par gaya. Judge sahib ne dono ki dalil suni or akhir main faisla kiya ki apne bete ko bulayo, usi se puchte hai ki who kya banana chahta hai, to pata chala ki bacha abhi paida nahi hua hai.

Bhai hum log to kuch karne ke bad us barein main apne vichar prakat kar rahe hai or aap KHAMKHWAH?

Ek kahawat or bhi yaad aayi ki “bhais” ke agee been bajane ka koi fayda nahi.

Ab isi thread ko lelo. Hona yeh chahiye tha ki who log jinhone Inter-caste marriage ki hai, unke opinion liye jatein ki unka kaisa experience raha hai, koi sawal uthta to uska jawab manga jata or agar kisika acha experience nahi raha to uska discussion causes etc. hota par hua yun ki kuch chotte bhai, jinka apna kuch personal experience to nahi raha hai par jo apni baat par arna jante hai ya har bade ki baat ko unjustify karma chahte hai , ke liye kuch point :-

1. Neither me, Dev Sir, Navin Bhai or Priti has anywhere on this thread has told you people to go for “Inter-caste Marriage”. All is said is that we just shared our good experiences because we had some commitment with an individual and we kept that.

2. Rahi hamare balko ke baat ki andhe kano ki jazro main who adhe Jat rahe ya Pure Jat(Lagta hai bhai ne abhi-2 Omkara dekhi hai), to bhai mhare balak hai, hum bhugat lenge unhe, tum chinta mat karo. We don’t need tutoring from you as how to raise them but yes, they are being raised perfectly and the first thing we taught them is that “Not to unnecessarily argue with elders” I think this is the first thing taught in Jat culture. I don’t know about others but for me if someone like respective Dev Sir gave his idea as contrary to mine idea then it will be “the End” for me, no more argument because he is elder to me and has more experience then me in life.

3. Learn something from Naveen Gulia bhai how decently he accepted your version, not like you and me that he quoted all you have said and start writing comments on all.

4. Oh Jato ke massiaah ure West main beth kar kya kar raha hai , teri jaroorat harre se Jato main and to mind you I think only 1% of jats are having accesss to Jatland so don’t waste your energy here, try to do something at the ground level as Gulia bhai and his team is doing.

Now its open to everyone to see and decide as who is wrong and who is right.
 
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Oh Man! Isse-2 thread padh ke sar paatan ho ja sae. Woh-he raagad
baar-2, aur koi sensible dang tae discussion koni karta (like Rajesh pointed
out).

In my public opinion:
At Micro Level: Do what personally suits you. Jit soot baith ja, ude danda
gaad do (no pun intended).

At Macro Level: It is a good idea to marry within the community.That
is a good guiding principle, but should not override personal circumstance.

In my Private Opinion:
I have always preferred the concept of a harem. Yeh Raja/Mahrajae
types daaki thaath lege. Jats are shers without crowns but we still
should strive for the noble lifestyle. And in such a setup, the head "Sherni"
would be Jatni, and the other ladies in the harem could be "assorted" picks.
This way Kharb types bhi khush, "the maadurn" types bhi khush, aur
hum tae "khush he khush" ;) :cool:
 
raj_rathee said:
Oh Man! Isse-2 thread padh ke sar paatan ho ja sae. Woh-he raagad
baar-2, aur koi sensible dang tae discussion koni karta (like Rajesh pointed
out).

In my public opinion:
At Micro Level: Do what personally suits you. Jit soot baith ja, ude danda
gaad do (no pun intended).

At Macro Level: It is a good idea to marry within the community.That
is a good guiding principle, but should not override personal circumstance.

In my Private Opinion:
I have always preferred the concept of a harem. Yeh Raja/Mahrajae
types daaki thaath lege. Jats are shers without crowns but we still
should strive for the noble lifestyle. And in such a setup, the head "Sherni"
would be Jatni, and the other ladies in the harem could be "assorted" picks.
This way Kharb types bhi khush, "the maadurn" types bhi khush, aur
hum tae "khush he khush" ;) :cool:
Click to expand...

Kat diya Rog, kati jarr se:p
 
ritu said:
kharub please bura mat maniyo .as i can see from ur views that u r going to marry a jatni only.tera bahay t jab hoga hoga.par man apni os bebe p ebe t daya aan lag gayi h.i am just kidding.
any ways good to see ur spirits and love for the community.
Click to expand...


Ritu Ji ... in light of the skewed sex ratio in our quam ..... nu lage hai aak Jatni ke intzaar mein kade byah e na hove ..... Randa e rahna pad ja ... or phir koi aa bhi gayi to puri khushamad rakhni padegi ... kade bhaaj ja na ... :D :D :D
 
intercaste marriage....!

depends on individual life style...time ,situation....and various factor matters.

so one cannot say he/she will preffer intercaste marriage....:cool:
 
rajeshrathee said:
Bhai hum log to kuch karne ke bad us barein main apne vichar prakat kar rahe hai or aap KHAMKHWAH?

naa ji aap e she ho ... hum to khamka e ha

Ek kahawat or bhi yaad aayi ki “bhais” ke agee been bajane ka koi fayda nahi.

Ab Bhagwan ne bhais bana diya to kya kare bhai sahab ... ab to isi roop me jina padega


Ab isi thread ko lelo. Hona yeh chahiye tha ki who log jinhone Inter-caste marriage ki hai, unke opinion liye jatein ki unka kaisa experience raha hai, koi sawal uthta to uska jawab manga jata or agar kisika acha experience nahi raha to uska discussion causes etc. hota par hua yun ki kuch chotte bhai, jinka apna kuch personal experience to nahi raha hai par jo apni baat par arna jante hai ya har bade ki baat ko unjustify karma chahte hai , ke liye kuch point :-

1. Neither me, Dev Sir, Navin Bhai or Priti has anywhere on this thread has told you people to go for “Inter-caste Marriage”. All is said is that we just shared our good experiences because we had some commitment with an individual and we kept that.

2. Rahi hamare balko ke baat ki andhe kano ki jazro main who adhe Jat rahe ya Pure Jat(Lagta hai bhai ne abhi-2 Omkara dekhi hai),

Bhai sahab I posted same comments in a similar discussion about two years ago in a similar discussion ... I might not be as smart as you .. but I am intellectually no so challenged as well that i have to rely on "Omkara" and "Bollywood" for my beliefs ......... I though I had formed a better impression than that

to bhai mhare balak hai, hum bhugat lenge unhe, tum chinta mat karo. We don’t need tutoring from you as how to raise them but yes, they are being raised perfectly

Nobody offered you any parenting advice ..... I clearly stated that ........ and if you still dont get it ... feel free to interpret it the way you want .... I know what I meant .. and I still stand firm ... and I was taking in terms of a community .. and your focus now is yourself ...

and the first thing we taught them is that “Not to unnecessarily argue with elders” I think this is the first thing taught in Jat culture. I don’t know about others but for me if someone like respective Dev Sir gave his idea as contrary to mine idea then it will be “the End” for me, no more argument because he is elder to me and has more experience then me in life.

Dev Ji is highly respected .... and giving a logical argument is never offensive ... Panchayat was also consisted of elders .. why did not take their decision without complaining ... why are you bitching about the panchayati decision in other cases ... very good philosophy .. what suits you needs to be followed .. what does not needs to be dropped .... Well my parents must have done a terrible job in raising me up ..... I feel so sorry for myself for such bad manners

3. Learn something from Naveen Gulia bhai how decently he accepted your version, not like you and me that he quoted all you have said and start writing comments on all.

I know he did ... He is a known gentleman ... and maybe he knows what he believes in and does not want to argue about it ... his mind is set and firm ... i am still learning and have no problem in debating - stating my views and findind out other people's views as well ........

4. Oh Jato ke massiaah ure West main beth kar kya kar raha hai , teri jaroorat harre se Jato main and to mind you I think only 1% of jats are having accesss to Jatland so don’t waste your energy here, try to do something at the ground level as Gulia bhai and his team is doing.

Now why are you making it personal ......... what is this massiaah rubbish ??
Come if we have to discuss, lets keep it sensible ... othwerwise lets withdraw ... and not start mud slanging

Now its open to everyone to see and decide as who is wrong and who is right.
Click to expand...

Navin Gulia is high accomplished .... noble soul, dedicated to community service

Bhia sahab ........ tell what have you done so great that you keep talking about ground work and reality ........ tell me please ........ I woudl like to seek some inspiration .. what great deed did you do for teh community by the age of 24 (I am 24) that you keep telling me what I need to do to serve my community ........ my whole family is doing it ........ and so I think I presently have time on my hands to do a bit for myself .................
 
raj_rathee said:
In my public opinion:
At Micro Level: Do what personally suits you. Jit soot baith ja, ude danda
gaad do (no pun intended).

At Macro Level: It is a good idea to marry within the community.That
is a good guiding principle, but should not override personal circumstance.

Thats right ...... some people macro plan and some micro plan ........ I macro plan and strategise ...... so thats me ........ nothing wrong with micro planners .... just different paradigms


In my Private Opinion:
I have always preferred the concept of a harem. Yeh Raja/Mahrajae
types daaki thaath lege. Jats are shers without crowns but we still
should strive for the noble lifestyle. And in such a setup, the head "Sherni"
would be Jatni, and the other ladies in the harem could be "assorted" picks.
This way Kharb types bhi khush, "the maadurn" types bhi khush, aur
hum tae "khush he khush" ;) :cool:
Click to expand...

Harem legally allowed ho ja ... to rog sa e kat ja ga ...... phir to koi jhanjhat hi nahin .. saare kush ..........

Kharb types bhi khush, "the maadurn"
Bhai Sahab kharub itna Talibani bhi nahin hai .......
 
kharub said:
Harem legally allowed ho ja ... to rog sa e kat ja ga ...... phir to koi jhanjhat hi nahin .. saare kush ..........
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Pehli baat, Mahari panchayat allow kar de tae legal he legal sae (Jaton
ki Panchayat ki Jaton ki Jaroorat samanj sakti hai).

Dusri baat: I don't think saare khush honge...Punjabi bhai log
tae ghane dhuki ho jaange... ;) :D :eek:
 
Dear Vishawjeet Kharab/ Vishawjeet Kadyan or Vishawjeet Jaat
Heere are the answers in your style


Bhai hum log to kuch karne ke bad us barein main apne vichar prakat kar rahe hai or aap KHAMKHWAH?

naa ji aap e she ho ... hum to khamka e ha

Chako koi sachai to accept kari

Ek kahawat or bhi yaad aayi ki “bhais” ke agee been bajane ka koi fayda nahi.

Ab Bhagwan ne bhais bana diya to kya kare bhai sahab ... ab to isi roop me jina padega

Bhai ek example or diya tha us baarein main na kuch kilha apne?

Ab isi thread ko lelo. Hona yeh chahiye tha ki who log jinhone Inter-caste marriage ki hai, unke opinion liye jatein ki unka kaisa experience raha hai, koi sawal uthta to uska jawab manga jata or agar kisika acha experience nahi raha to uska discussion causes etc. hota par hua yun ki kuch chotte bhai, jinka apna kuch personal experience to nahi raha hai par jo apni baat par arna jante hai ya har bade ki baat ko unjustify karma chahte hai , ke liye kuch point :-

1. Neither me, Dev Sir, Navin Bhai or Priti has anywhere on this thread has told you people to go for “Inter-caste Marriage”. All is said is that we just shared our good experiences because we had some commitment with an individual and we kept that.

2. Rahi hamare balko ke baat ki andhe kano ki jazro main who adhe Jat rahe ya Pure Jat(Lagta hai bhai ne abhi-2 Omkara dekhi hai),

Bhai sahab I posted same comments in a similar discussion about two years ago in a similar discussion ... I might not be as smart as you .. but I am intellectually no so challenged as well that i have to rely on "Omkara" and "Bollywood" for my beliefs ......... I though I had formed a better impression than that

You write well, no doubt about that but you need to polish the way you put in your thoughts. The basic thing behind all that we are arguing is not personal but to just let you understand that learn to respect others view also. There is a difference when you put your thoughts in a separate post and when you quote someone post and write your comments where you can put in something and not to write where you don’t have anything to say. That way it becomes personal. Secondly as I suggested you earlier that doesn’t try to force others to accept your version. Put them on site and then let others visualize/interpret it.

Otherwise you have a JAT at both end and this will continue for ever?

to bhai mhare balak hai, hum bhugat lenge unhe, tum chinta mat karo. We don’t need tutoring from you as how to raise them but yes, they are being raised perfectly

Nobody offered you any parenting advice ..... I clearly stated that ........ and if you still dont get it ... feel free to interpret it the way you want .... I know what I meant .. and I still stand firm ... and I was taking in terms of a community .. and your focus now is yourself ...

I think it was you who said that the children after such marriages will be half Jat .And how come you become the community spoke-person?

and the first thing we taught them is that “Not to unnecessarily argue with elders” I think this is the first thing taught in Jat culture. I don’t know about others but for me if someone like respective Dev Sir gave his idea as contrary to mine idea then it will be “the End” for me, no more argument because he is elder to me and has more experience then me in life.

Dev Ji is highly respected .... and giving a logical argument is never offensive ... Panchayat was also consisted of elders .. why did not take their decision without complaining ... why are you bitching about the panchayati decision in other cases ... very good philosophy .. what suits you needs to be followed .. what does not needs to be dropped .... Well my parents must have done a terrible job in raising me up ..... I feel so sorry for myself for such bad manners

You again interpret it wrong. I said there is a need for educated persons in panchayat, not the old uneducated one, who don’t know anything about outside world then their village or Khap. Dev sir jaise log panchayat main ho jaye to aise decision hi na ho mere bhai.

3. Learn something from Naveen Gulia bhai how decently he accepted your version, not like you and me that he quoted all you have said and start writing comments on all.

I know he did ... He is a known gentleman ... and maybe he knows what he believes in and does not want to argue about it ... his mind is set and firm ... i am still learning and have no problem in debating - stating my views and findind out other people's views as well ........

It’s not a platform for debate; it’s a platform for knowing each other first so that we have a better sense of brotherhood. This platform is not to pull each other legs.

4. Oh Jato ke massiaah ure West main beth kar kya kar raha hai , teri jaroorat harre se Jato main and to mind you I think only 1% of jats are having accesss to Jatland so don’t waste your energy here, try to do something at the ground level as Gulia bhai and his team is doing.

Now why are you making it personal ......... what is this massiaah rubbish??
Come if we have to discuss, let’s keep it sensible ... othwerwise lets withdraw ... and not start mud slanging

I am again saying that think only 1% of jats are having accesss to Jatland so don’t waste your energy here, try to do something at the ground level as Gulia bhai and his team is doing. So if you are serious about doing something for Jats, do that at ground work why you are wasting your energy at a place where only 1% of Jats interact and most of them don’t reply.

Now its open to everyone to see and decide as who is wrong and who is right.
 
rajeshrathee said:
Dear Vishawjeet Kharab/ Vishawjeet Kadyan or Vishawjeet Jaat
Heere are the answers in your style

Bhai hum log to kuch karne ke bad us barein main apne vichar prakat kar rahe hai or aap KHAMKHWAH?

naa ji aap e sher ho ... hum to khamka e ha

Chako koi sachai to accept kari

“bhais” ke agee been bajane ka koi fayda nahi.

Now its open to everyone to see and decide as who is wrong and who is right.
Click to expand...

I will not get to the lows of personal slandering .... everything I had to say is there already ... and as this discussion is for sure headed in the wrong direction .. as is obvious ... I will withdraw from it .......

You being upset with anybody opposed to inter-cast marriage is natural .... as you are into one yourself ... your personal hurt is justified ...

I was never outrightly opposed to inter-cast marriage .. infact if you read the posts properly you will realise that infact I support inter-cast marriage in certain cases

Thats it from me on this issue ..... even though you went on calling me khamkha and Bhais and all ... I still hold respect for you

I am neither married myself nor did I ever project myself as any authority ..... My views are just the views of a community youth and other people who have contacted me and encouraged to go on with the discussion .. as they themselves do not want to be labelled "backward" ... I have no fear of labels .. as I am sure about myself

I seek a graceful exit and thus choose to withdraw
 
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bhai mere opinion mein te apni community mein shaadi karne se acchi baat aur koi nai. waise bhi jaaton se accha kabhi koi hua hai bhala?? I used to think (when i was a lil childish)..ki yeh community wommunity kya hoti hai, intercaste marriage se koi farak nahi padta.. but now, i am pro intra community marriages. I have many reasons for that but dont want to quote them here as they may offend a few ppl here!! magar bhai jab dil aa jya kisi "ahem" aur pe te jat community te kya bhagwan bhi juda nahi kar sakta do premiyon ko..:D :D !!!
 
kharub said:
That thread still exists why dont you go on over there ......... ya bina chutki liye swad hi nahi aata :) :)
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dont take it otherwisw kharub,,im really eager to hear smthing about ur jat revolution....;) uss thread mein to itna joor shoor tey tha,,,fer kimmey baat ey na cheddi,,, suna de kimmey :)

I`ve spent a lot of time thinking about this issue and I`ve tried to keep my personal bias out of the picture. Trust me, its not easy to have an opinion and suggest solutions without your personal bias .........;) ;)

in our community ,marriage is not just the association of 2 individuals,2 families r associated....for some people this might be of no concern, and for some this really is a point of worry! it depends ........
i dont think dat Preservation of identity,,tradition and culture don't have to depend on things such as these.An identity is what you create for yourself.....;)

you all have a good thoughts, but never be too rigid in a view, flexibility is a great thing ....... cheers:) :)
 
monikadahiya said:
bhai mere opinion mein te apni community mein shaadi karne se acchi baat aur koi nai. waise bhi jaaton se accha kabhi koi hua hai bhala?? I used to think (when i was a lil childish)..ki yeh community wommunity kya hoti hai, intercaste marriage se koi farak nahi padta.. but now, i am pro intra community marriages. I have many reasons for that but dont want to quote them here as they may offend a few ppl here!! magar bhai jab dil aa jya kisi "ahem" aur pe te jat community te kya bhagwan bhi juda nahi kar sakta do premiyon ko..:D :D !!!
Click to expand...



Ek dum sahi kaha Monika ji aapne, dil ke aagey nahin chalta hai jor kisi ka

achhey achhey dil ke aagey fana ho jate hai.... jab dil dimag par bhari padta hai to.
 
Take it easy Jatlanders, take it easy!!!
we're here to discuss not for blowin cyber joots :D

Well, VJ bhai cool it yaar....I know u're quite an enthu jat bhai but bro hold ur horses we're here to unite not to divide I guess :)

My 2 cents :>> Bhai marriage is matter of personal choice and I think
when it comes to luv marriage cast creed or color rarely matters for the couple & u know jab miya bibi raaji to kya karega kaaji but when it comes to arrange marriage leave it on ur parents they'll surely find a better compatible match for you of ur own communitiy :)

but I believe Marriage is big gamble, be it luv or arrange...ur life can be hell or heaven....but I guess Zindgi mein Risk lena hi padta hai ;)

Bhai, agar koi Jat ya Jatni non-jat se shaadi karta hai to bhi apni race ko koi jyada farak nahi padne wala cuz Jat Element in ur genes itself is so strong n dominating that it certainly outclass other counterparts....isliye inke children mein bhi Jat element hi dominating hoga, aur u can't just disguise ki ye bache half-Jat hein!!...I've heaps of example where either jats or jatnis got married to non-Jat indians or even foreigners but still their children are very much Jats & this is matter of pride to them.

So all in all our Jat race will always be dominating & great!!!

Before ending I strongly believe there's nothing more precious then finding a true, uncontional luv...so if its true luv not infatuation, then I'm with who support luv marriages!

over n out!!!


chill! chill! & have fun!


Rock on
Jit
 
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