We nee to find solution to such issues. Killing in today time is dragging the community in darkness. It is right we should not allow our son & daughter to get marry in same gotra and village. On the other hand we need to find practical solution to such issues so that other community may not see us with bad name. Gotra is concept of Hindu religion and not only JATS. Hindu religion has forgotten its basic principles. I think solution for this is to ask such boys & girls to drop their Gotra and adopt Surname like Chpora, Arora , Kapoor where marriage with in family is allowed. We should disown such boys and girls. In case they agree to drop the Gotra from their name & left their village may solve the issue to some extent. It is my personnel view.
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Rohtak in news again for honor killing!!
- Thread starter prashantacmet
- Start date
अगर हमारा थोड़ा बहुत भी विश्वास सामाजिक मान्यताओं में है तो हमें यह मानना होगा कि, सबसे बड़ी गलती तो उन बच्चों की होती है जो इतने स्वार्थी हो जाते हैं कि अपनी जंगली हवस मिटाने के लिए माँ बाप की उम्मीदों और इज्ज़त की बलि चढ़ा देते हैं i माना कि शरीर और इन्द्रियों पर नियंत्रण पाने में काफी कठिनाई होती है, लेकिन नियंत्रण के अतिरिक्त इसका कोई पर्याय नहीं होता i मनुष्य की इच्छाओं का कोई अंत नहीं होता, और इनकी पूर्ती एक नियंत्रित ढंग से ही करनी होगी; यदि एक स्वस्थ और तनावरहित जीवन की अपेक्षा करते हैं तो i यह प्यार व्यार कुछ पल के चोंचले और निरा ढकोसला भर ही होता है मेरे हिसाब से i अगर हो भी जाये तो इसको भी अपने आचार विचार की दृढ़ता और सूझ बूझ से नियंत्रित और सही दिशा में संचालित किया जा सकता है i अगर मन को खुला छोड़ दिया जायेगा तो हमारा मन इतना शैतान होता है कि पता नहीं कल को किस से प्यार कर बैठे i अगर ऐसा नियन्त्र हमारे नवयुवक और नव युवतियां नहीं कर पाएंगे तो फिर उसके दुष्परिणाम ही होंगे i
परन्तु उपरोक्त कथन के पश्चात मेरा यह मानना है कि अपने ही बच्चों की ह्त्या करना एक जघन्य और शर्मनाक अपराध है और रोहतक के एक गाँव में जो कुछ हुआ वो अच्छा नहीं हुआ i इससे समुदाय की बदनामी ही हुई है i सबसे अच्छा तरीका यही था की उस लडकी से उम्र भर के लिए नाता तोड़ लेते और उसके हाल पर छोड़ देते i
परन्तु उपरोक्त कथन के पश्चात मेरा यह मानना है कि अपने ही बच्चों की ह्त्या करना एक जघन्य और शर्मनाक अपराध है और रोहतक के एक गाँव में जो कुछ हुआ वो अच्छा नहीं हुआ i इससे समुदाय की बदनामी ही हुई है i सबसे अच्छा तरीका यही था की उस लडकी से उम्र भर के लिए नाता तोड़ लेते और उसके हाल पर छोड़ देते i
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It's very hard to raise kids in rural background n make them understand our own culture n values .bcoz the colleges or institutes they attend in cities have kids from urban areas like Delhi. Once our desi kids start comparing themselves or start imitating those kids then problem starts ... I m listening such kind of stories from real ppl.the girl in this case was merely 18 yr old . Not all the kids are mature at that age to diff between right or wrong. I think cases like this will keep happening unless parents or Khaps will do something about it . They need to talk to their kids openly about our value system n consequences of not abiding with. In this particular case both the families could have handled this matter in more mature way. I know it's easier said than done..... But killing should never be option to resolve cases like this.
shekharjat
New member
same gotra marriage is reflection of the society ....what v r witnessing today is crumbling of social customs that were in vogue from thousand years.........who is to blame.......TV,INTERNET,BOLLYWOOD,MNCS....there is a need for serious introspection...
you all must have heard news of love affairs between cousins....sudden exposure to metro lifestyle......glorification of girlfriend -boyfriend relation ...rather it has been made a necessity by whole media driven society to have a partner when u r studying.....if u do not have a partner u are made to feel useless.......there is so much of peer pressure that only a few courageous souls are able to hold back their family traditions........
what can you expect from young ppl of whom 80%(numbers can be debate... according to places where u live this is my own estimate of my surroundings) are boozing.......see hookah bars as paradise .....disco as a necessity...
free porn.......vulgar movies..glorification of ppl like sunny leone ....and new me culture all can be blamed....but this will not stop....either you amend Hindu marriage act and declare same gotra marriage as incest or see this a new phenomenon
you all must have heard news of love affairs between cousins....sudden exposure to metro lifestyle......glorification of girlfriend -boyfriend relation ...rather it has been made a necessity by whole media driven society to have a partner when u r studying.....if u do not have a partner u are made to feel useless.......there is so much of peer pressure that only a few courageous souls are able to hold back their family traditions........
what can you expect from young ppl of whom 80%(numbers can be debate... according to places where u live this is my own estimate of my surroundings) are boozing.......see hookah bars as paradise .....disco as a necessity...
free porn.......vulgar movies..glorification of ppl like sunny leone ....and new me culture all can be blamed....but this will not stop....either you amend Hindu marriage act and declare same gotra marriage as incest or see this a new phenomenon
I don't think so there is any specific places where we can make kids understand about our own culture values. If there is any place then it is home only either it is situated in cities or rural area. This kind of things as duo did might would have happened in cities as well but did not come in news as their parents handled it either friendly or let them free to go if they were not able to understand.
And I don't think so the duos were not aware about that girl and boy from same villages and same gotra are considered to be as brother and sister.
In rural area, either kids are afraid or feel shy to share anything about their life with their parents as parents are not too open with their child. And hence these kinds of things take place.
In this immature age and moreover influenced by Cinema, youngsters are not able to differentiate between wrong and right.
Parents should behave friendly with their children and often should discuss about our culture so children can understand and can talk to them freely and can share their views about life. And by doing this children would be able to differentiate between wrong and right.
Killing is not the solution at all. We are human beings and we don't have right to take anybody life. Doing this heinous crime, parents also have not set any good example for society.
And I don't think so the duos were not aware about that girl and boy from same villages and same gotra are considered to be as brother and sister.
In rural area, either kids are afraid or feel shy to share anything about their life with their parents as parents are not too open with their child. And hence these kinds of things take place.
In this immature age and moreover influenced by Cinema, youngsters are not able to differentiate between wrong and right.
Parents should behave friendly with their children and often should discuss about our culture so children can understand and can talk to them freely and can share their views about life. And by doing this children would be able to differentiate between wrong and right.
Killing is not the solution at all. We are human beings and we don't have right to take anybody life. Doing this heinous crime, parents also have not set any good example for society.
samarkadian
Active member
Its a stupid and moronic argument that kids cant be raised in rural background. Arushi Talwar murder case and various incest forums and blogs sprouting out are the examples which surpasses this rural background raising example.
What i was trying to convey here is that things about gotra system n our culture. My sister lives in small town in haryana n her daughter goes to a technical institute where more than 50 perecent students come from delhi. She compares herself with those students n try to imitate too . My sister has sometimes tough time making her understand that things which r ok n cool for those kids are not allowed for her . Those kids wont have any idea aboout gotra n all n god forbid if my niece ever get in to a situation like this those kids will tell her that oh your parents r unreasonable n all. I should correct my statement i think that all jat kids should be made aware if their culture time to time .... Mr samar you could use better words to show ur furstration if u do not agree to someones view....so that the other person donot get hurt!Its a stupid and moronic argument that kids cant be raised in rural background. Arushi Talwar murder case and various incest forums and blogs sprouting out are the examples which surpasses this rural background raising example.
yes reenu you explained it very well. I hope incidents like this wont happen in future.I don't think so there is any specific places where we can make kids understand about our own culture values. If there is any place then it is home only either it is situated in cities or rural area. This kind of things as duo did might would have happened in cities as well but did not come in news as their parents handled it either friendly or let them free to go if they were not able to understand.
And I don't think so the duos were not aware about that girl and boy from same villages and same gotra are considered to be as brother and sister.
In rural area, either kids are afraid or feel shy to share anything about their life with their parents as parents are not too open with their child. And hence these kinds of things take place.
In this immature age and moreover influenced by Cinema, youngsters are not able to differentiate between wrong and right.
Parents should behave friendly with their children and often should discuss about our culture so children can understand and can talk to them freely and can share their views about life. And by doing this children would be able to differentiate between wrong and right.
Killing is not the solution at all. We are human beings and we don't have right to take anybody life. Doing this heinous crime, parents also have not set any good example for society.
rekhasmriti
New member
I had some discussion regarding same with elders , things I observe :
1- Killing is to set an example .......to stop all this ......
But answer was enough parents tried it , not working rather more such cases . Intention is too STOP it , but way is pathetic tragic. We must think of some other way .
There is one thing which was bothering me more n more , it was some illegitimate affair which can not happen in a day .......how come parents could not know what was going under their nose . So they might be p***** o** on themselves n took it all out on their BLOOD
1- Killing is to set an example .......to stop all this ......
But answer was enough parents tried it , not working rather more such cases . Intention is too STOP it , but way is pathetic tragic. We must think of some other way .
There is one thing which was bothering me more n more , it was some illegitimate affair which can not happen in a day .......how come parents could not know what was going under their nose . So they might be p***** o** on themselves n took it all out on their BLOOD
drrajpalsingh
New member
To know how the Heads and representatives of various khap panchayats of Haryana view the killing of Dharmender and Nidhi on September 18, 2013 at Garnawathi village near Rohtak and their suggestions to stop recurrence of such incidents in future, read full report published in The Tribune, Chandigarh, p. 1, news item: 'Ban same gotra marriages to curb Honour killings: Khaps'
or
Link: www.tribuneindia.com
or
Link: www.tribuneindia.com
prashantacmet
New member
A case happened in gurgaon..and it doe snot even seem to be a rape....looks like some deal went wrong between boy and girl...boy was from Bhiwani . People read this and started bashing haryana, khaps and jats..comments took me down..how to fight with this trap?...media khap, haryana, jat..yeh sab news namak-mirch laag ke present karta hain..aur yeh nDTV to ek bhi mauka nahi chookta....kal sunday ko 8 bajje bhi khap ke upper koi purani debate dikha raha tha..hadh kar rakhi hai inhone.......
http://www.ndtv.com/article/cities/...rty-in-gurgaon-422220?pfrom=home-otherstories
http://www.ndtv.com/article/cities/...rty-in-gurgaon-422220?pfrom=home-otherstories
Instead find a solution to it .
1.Make the boy and Girl live in different places. Send them to there relatives for a year or two.If this doesnot work they Try the second one.
2.Most the youngsters who elope have not seen the reality, they live in an illusion .
I am sure if you make them face the real world, let them earn there bread n butter , they will understand what mistake they have done. Its not so easy to survive without a support system.
.
Pehla tarika aaj naye jamanne me nahi chalega....
- phon-phan se sab dhore.. arr shahar me milan-fettan ki jagah bhateri ho rahi se aajkal.
- Koi rishtedar suvassann chhori ne na otte eeb, khaaskar malom hote hue bhi.
ek cheez try ki jaa sakti hai..
saari rishtedari, gotti bhai katthe karr ke... sabke saamne pocchi bandhwao.....photto kheencho (aur is photo ko gali me poster bana ke tanghwa do gaam me) arr kaho... ak bette, je eeb bhi manas ka beej se to tikk ja....sharam kar.... 'baaki eeb te tu samajh e gaya hoga ak tu ke kuhwaya jaaga'
jameen, jaaydaad, rishtedari, gaon, guhaand seem....... har jageh se bedakhal kar do.... ki jo koi inki madad karega.. unpar bhi social ban....
Too Blunt, Samar.
I fully endorse your view except your arrogant behaviour and support for honour killing. You know the after-effects?
Both families are now wasted, murderers will spend their lives in jail and their kids and elderly family members will have to suffer all their lives? Media and all other so called intellectuals got spice for their stale news? And damage will be done to image of Jats and our community.
Wondering if your signature of bridging gap makes sense at all in this context?
I fully endorse your view except your arrogant behaviour and support for honour killing. You know the after-effects?
Both families are now wasted, murderers will spend their lives in jail and their kids and elderly family members will have to suffer all their lives? Media and all other so called intellectuals got spice for their stale news? And damage will be done to image of Jats and our community.
Wondering if your signature of bridging gap makes sense at all in this context?
Yeahh, I am wrong but few things are objective and they must stay objective irrespective of any centuary. Yes, my value system is retarded as well and so does my brain. I am glad to be wrong and hateful. Thanks for the diagnosis.
samarkadian
Active member
Too Blunt, Samar.
I fully endorse your view except your arrogant behaviour and support for honour killing. You know the after-effects?
Both families are now wasted, murderers will spend their lives in jail and their kids and elderly family members will have to suffer all their lives? Media and all other so called intellectuals got spice for their stale news? And damage will be done to image of Jats and our community.
Wondering if your signature of bridging gap makes sense at all in this context?
Dear Cool and ''Sensible'' Jat Jit,
I am not interested in after effects at all. I am of the belief that this image is better than an image of supporting incestual relationship and blowing chest about being liberal. As I said that certain things needs to stay objective and line crosser shall be treated with such examples. I have no sympathy or whatsoever for them. I sound arrogant as I state which I think and believe in. Where as my signature is concerned, that has no connection with incestual relationship supporting liberals. Further to sound more arrogant, I don't care what media writes about us at all. They have a business to do and they would do it with anyone. Even further arrogancy is that I don't care what fellow educated Jatlanders think about my stand. I can't sound politically correct here.
http://in.news.yahoo.com/will-do-it-again--says-father-of-lynched-girl-101732178.html
phoolkumar
New member
Brahmin girl killed by her kins for marrying Jat boy in Haryana:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzvYwS3_kcE
yahi media ki impartiality hai, is case mein donon parties Jats kyun na hui....media ne Khaps and Jats ki band baja deni thi....jabki ab is maamle ko hue 1 saal ke kareeb ho chuka hai but hardly hi kisi ko iska pata hai.....we Jats really need to think on it on how to nail this media for this impartial attitude towards Jats!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzvYwS3_kcE
yahi media ki impartiality hai, is case mein donon parties Jats kyun na hui....media ne Khaps and Jats ki band baja deni thi....jabki ab is maamle ko hue 1 saal ke kareeb ho chuka hai but hardly hi kisi ko iska pata hai.....we Jats really need to think on it on how to nail this media for this impartial attitude towards Jats!
Dear Brother,
Good, I admire your firm stand.
All clear, but still what you have to say about the two families who are on stack after such agitated murdering. We need to find alternate way that 'Saanp bhi mar jaaye aur laathi bhi na tutte'. Any ideas?
Good, I admire your firm stand.
All clear, but still what you have to say about the two families who are on stack after such agitated murdering. We need to find alternate way that 'Saanp bhi mar jaaye aur laathi bhi na tutte'. Any ideas?
Dear Cool and ''Sensible'' Jat Jit,
I am not interested in after effects at all. I am of the belief that this image is better than an image of supporting incestual relationship and blowing chest about being liberal. As I said that certain things needs to stay objective and line crosser shall be treated with such examples. I have no sympathy or whatsoever for them. I sound arrogant as I state which I think and believe in. Where as my signature is concerned, that has no connection with incestual relationship supporting liberals. Further to sound more arrogant, I don't care what media writes about us at all. They have a business to do and they would do it with anyone. Even further arrogancy is that I don't care what fellow educated Jatlanders think about my stand. I can't sound politically correct here.
http://in.news.yahoo.com/will-do-it-again--says-father-of-lynched-girl-101732178.html
[TD="width: 161, bgcolor: #f8efdb"] [/TD]
[TD="width: 568"]
Khaps to form 101-member panel for amendment to marriage Act
Ravinder Saini
Ravinder Saini
Jhajjar, September 23
Representatives of various khaps have decided to constitute a 101-member committee to launch a campaign across the state to seek amendment to the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955.
Dhankhar Sabha chief Om Prakash Dhankhar said here today Baljeet Singh Malik, chief of the Malik-Gathwala khap, would lead the committee to mount pressure on the state government for amendment to the marriage Act in order to prevent the rising incidents of same-gotra marriages and honour killings.
"We have also resolved to call on Chief Minister Bhupinder Singh Hooda in Delhi next week to persuade him for amendment to the Act at the state-level," said Dhankhar.
The khap leader said a delegation of various khaps had also met Hooda a year ago in connection with the demand. The Chief Minister had at that time assured them to raise the issue with the Centre for quick action, he added."This time, we wish to get the amendment done to the Act as the state government can also amend the law. Such amendments have already been done by the governments of Karnataka, Pondicherry, Tamil Nadu, UP and Punjab," he said.
[/TD]
drrajpalsingh
New member
Brahmin girl killed by her kins for marrying Jat boy in Haryana:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzvYwS3_kcE
yahi media ki impartiality hai, is case mein donon parties Jats kyun na hui....media ne Khaps and Jats ki band baja deni thi....jabki ab is maamle ko hue 1 saal ke kareeb ho chuka hai but hardly hi kisi ko iska pata hai.....we Jats really need to think on it on how to nail this media for this impartial attitude towards Jats!
No caste tags of the victims please.
Every brute act deserves condemnation in severest words, there is no question of the caste of the victims involved !
It is the death of human beings and the mankind as such.
soniadabas
New member
I agree that even relatives would refrain from keeping them as even they are afraid of the blame they might get if, they run away from there custody .
I think that such issue must be dealt with utmost sensitivity. We must see the practicability .
I am sure before the duo was killed , they too were humiliated in public in front of relatives .Did they stop after all that torture. No,I don’t think so,
You can not win a person’s trust by humiliating them.
By indulging in childish behavior like making them tie a rakhi or insulting them in front of relatives wont be of any help at all. Such behaviour will not help in finding a solution.
Feelings of affection won’t die in a day or two. It requires time to heal a wound.
We must not forget that, it is not only the family that is suffering but also the duo who is at the receiving end. They get constant humiliation from family and relatives. Therefore they need counseling from a mature person who can guide them. They must not be judged at every now and then.
The family must free them self from the gulit of being associated with them. They must understand that they are there own children. Give them proper counselling, instead of making fun of them.
Moreover they have only committed mistake by not making a right choice but that doesnot label them as a criminal.
I think that such issue must be dealt with utmost sensitivity. We must see the practicability .
I am sure before the duo was killed , they too were humiliated in public in front of relatives .Did they stop after all that torture. No,I don’t think so,
You can not win a person’s trust by humiliating them.
By indulging in childish behavior like making them tie a rakhi or insulting them in front of relatives wont be of any help at all. Such behaviour will not help in finding a solution.
Feelings of affection won’t die in a day or two. It requires time to heal a wound.
We must not forget that, it is not only the family that is suffering but also the duo who is at the receiving end. They get constant humiliation from family and relatives. Therefore they need counseling from a mature person who can guide them. They must not be judged at every now and then.
The family must free them self from the gulit of being associated with them. They must understand that they are there own children. Give them proper counselling, instead of making fun of them.
Moreover they have only committed mistake by not making a right choice but that doesnot label them as a criminal.