I think marriage should be by choice and comfort level and not by compulsion of doing it in a limited sphere. After all its a question of your entire life.
Rathee Bhai sahab you are absolutely right, but marriage in traditional terms is essentially a social ceremony and the love and all these concepts have been recently imported into this institution from the WEST ...... I am not saying there is anything wrong with the new editions , but they are alien to our traditional model
See the primitive context. Jats were marrying into themselves and are either farmers or in defence.
Then why are now we are in different fields and doing extremely well.
Now just think that someone giving some limited professions that a JAT should work in these professions only?
I am sorry to say Bhai Sahab, but this is not the only reason Jats have married internally. Jats have also pursued a lot of professions historically from being Kings & Conquerers, Traders to Farmers, Colonists, Doctors & Entreprenuers ........ And a sense of community is much more stronger than a need to marry internally
... Look at Jews they do everything from scientists (Albert Einstein) to Bankers (Rothchilds) to Politics (dont need any names here do we) to Journalism (Wolf Blitzer - CNN) to Hollywood (Woody Allen, etc) ......... they dont have any need to marry internally but they do ......... because the concept of a race is much more stronger than a need to marry ........ And anybody who has pride in his her blood should see it as a want or a duty and not a need
Now I have some questions are all of our customs are justified in modern context? The unfair decisions by the so called "Panchayats" are fair? No because I think that the educations broaden the outlook of a person and if all the so called panchayat members would be atleast a graduate then the decision would be different.
Rathee bhai sahab a lot of people that we follow did not have any formal education. Education does enlighten but it is not the only criteria to judge someone's intellegence & intellect. A lot of leading personalities were "self-educated". You have people like Eisntein who did miserably at school and people like George Bush - a graduate fo Yale University.
And our community elders maybe not educated but are capable nonetheless.
The Panchayat system in not a "Dictatorship" but a very just and open system when the community decided what is right or wrong and if you live in a community you have to accept it.
Panchayati system is not how you have portrayed it - unjust & cruel. It is rather democratic, taking into account the feelings of the wider community and not just a few people. It is a fair system.
I have seen many a literate idiots ... trust me having a graduate degree is no gurantee of intellegence
Is it practible to call a husband and wife as brother and sister at a time when the wife is pregnant? So a person will tend to be influenced by the customs of other castes if they are found to be simple, justified or easy to follow.
Evil is always easy to follow and a person who gives into the easy should not be a part of a community and can do as he/she please. Its very hard to build, maintain and continue a community.
As for the particular incident you are talking about, Yes the particular decision was harsh and maybe unfair too, but this is why we have a system to follow.
They should have checked these things before getting married, cmmon we all know what is accepted and what is not and if someone still goes ahead and does wrong , knowingly or unknowingly this must be punishable and is in the legal system.
Yes the decisions might seem unfair and irrational from a personal angle, they are very impotant form the social perspective as they set the future trends.
If you donot check what is the permitted level of alcohol for driving in US and have 4-5 pints of beer and then caught driving, you think the offficer will buy your excuse of not knowing how much is the legal limit. - NO
Its your duty to find that out before you get drinking and then drive. Same here ...........
Why the barat are not staying for 2/3 nights now a days while it was a practise in the past?. Previously 3 gotra were avoided for marriage and now it has came down to 2 at many places ,Why?. Sahar main rahne walein apne ghar main 'bhais' kyun nahi bandhte? Purane time main husband ki maut ke bad dusre bhai ko latta udhane ki pratha ,(without considering the educational/maturity level) aajkal kaun jat ladki ya ladka brdasht karega?
The biggest problem with us people is that we percieve Westernasation to be Moderenisation ...... Its not so. We have our own ways of doing things and we should modernaise in our own way and not follow the western set-up as a guide for modernisation.
The changes you are talking about are not fundamental changes ........ a "bhais" does not make a Jat a Jat ....... but the shortcuts people have stated taking these days does not mean that it is the right way
Its very easy to talk of ideologies or telling someone to follow ideologies but are we following those. Every human is having different circumstances and the a decision taken at that time is influenced by those facts. There is a difference between saying and doing the same thing at different times.
Well this individualism that you are professing is the very Western Concept that is at odds with our culture, people & Quam. Jats have always done things for the community the whole Jat System is community based and so are our traditions.
If it was all about individualism, you would be able to marry any female and nobody would give a damn about the Gotras ...... you could marry your cousin if you wished to do so ....... But thats not the case
And this western inspired "Individualism" that you are professing is what is killing our values and culture
Our practices and culture has always been ideology & community based and not guided by personal whims. This individualism is alien to us
Isliye jo man main aaye karo, its your personal life, but take care of your family and take your family to a higher level then where your parents have brought that earlier.
..par